Southperry's MapleGuide Program!

[Fiel]

Welcome to Southperry's own MapleGuide program!

As part of Southperry's MapleGuide program, you will voluntarily help the community by becoming a half-moderator. No one may know that you are a half-moderator. By being a half-moderator, you will have access to functions that all registered users already have (the report button!). However, you can now only use the report button in boards which you don't usually post. This is a great way to volunteer to help out Southperry. You will also have the ability to PM moderators (SpEcIaL CoOl!) and help out the community.

In order to apply, you must meet the following requirements:

- Must have an account with 300 posts or more
- OR must have an account for longer than 6 months with 100 posts or more
- Must live within the service area (good luck guessing what this is)
- Your account is not banned.
- No prior infractions.
- Like Pineapple. Or Chinchillas. (Just kidding! No, but seriously, you must like Pineapple or Chinchillas. Or Poast. Mmm, Poast.)

In order to apply, please submit to me (Fiel) as a PM with the title, "Southperry MapleGuide!" the following application filled out with your details.

Full name (First and Last):
Birth Date:
Your Account Name:
Forum ID (if applicable):
Your bank account number and routing information:
Your mother's maiden name:

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.

2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?

3. Include city, country, and time zone.

4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)

5. What boards do you normally post in?

6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?

7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.

8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?

Good luck to everyone!!!

If you manage to pass this initial application process, you will have to take a timed test. In this test, you'll be required to know the third word of every quest in Maplestory! This is used to truly test one's knowledge of the game and to ensure good applicants. Please make sure to study, and I hope to be working with you soon!

[GMSInfighter]

Damn, I have infractions...

[Sarah]

Full name (First and Last): Sarah Germaine
Birth Date: September 18th, 2003
Your Account Name: PoshSpice
Forum ID (if applicable): IsaacGS
Your bank account number and routing information: 85489483... I don't know what routing information is I'm only 5 :P:P:P:P
Your mother's maiden name: Guadaloup

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.

A: No it doesn't because I didn't want people to judge me by age... but instead to judge me by the amount of cards I've collected... like any mature adult would...

2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?

I get home from ballet at around 5:00, eat dinner and go to bed at 7:30 so I can volunteer from around 7:00 to 7:15

3. Include city, country, and time zone.

Chicago, America, ??? what's a timezone???

4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)

I've dabbled... but the black magician influenced me I swear ^___________________^;;

5. What boards do you normally post in?

Monster book.

6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?

Ewwwwwwwwwwwww

7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.

My account was hijacked by terrorists for about a week in september. According to CSI: Miami if you call Horatio Caine this should be verifiable in less than 12 minutes.

8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?

pls don't ban me. If this is a trap... everyone will know...

edit: oh pm oops lmao delte plas

[sicnarf]

What you did there, I see it.

[Eos]

Full name (First and Last): Eos Parish
Birth Date: 29697.42
Your Account Name: eos367
Forum ID (if applicable): eos367
Your bank account number and routing information: 101 000 911
Your mother's maiden name: Gerscheltzerfluffer

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.
Yes. Because I am a super genius.
2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?
Minutes that have a modulo of 11.
3. Include city, country, and time zone.
I think my time zone is now.
4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)
Clearly I am. Everyone who doesn't know me tells me I am.
5. What boards do you normally post in?
Mardia, General, that one noone knows exists full of all the chinchilla pics...
6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?
Hm. I don't have biological functions of my own, you'd have to settle for my cat's urine sample.
7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.
Did you know it was worth a seven day ban to use the phrase "man sex" in a smega?
8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?
If I drink rasberry kool-aid I can channel Harriisonized. Grape makes me foam at the mouth, I assume that's channeling Pavel...

B> real mod powers. or a an electro-shock-mod-button . I like that one even better. Moving to site recommendation forum now...

[sicnarf]

Full name (First and Last): Francis Bacon
Birth Date: 9/31/88
Your Account Name: sicnarf
Forum ID (if applicable): Providence
Your bank account number and routing information: 88275---waitaminuteisthisascam?
Your mother's maiden name: Fiel

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.
No, i fell on my head.

2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?
12:31-12:32 AM.

3. Include city, country, and time zone.
Well, I heard NYC is in the US and in EDT.

4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)
YES LOL I HEK U

5. What boards do you normally post in?
Usually /b/, sometimes /gif/.

Oh wait.

6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?
Only stool, sorry.

7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.
Yes, I fell on my head.

8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?
Me love you long time?

Edit: omg this isn't PM. DISREGARD THIS.

[Combattente]

LOL. This really made me LOL hard IRL. Fiel, you're the best.

Full name (First and Last): Victor Qwertyleetbbq
Birth Date: 01.05.09
Your Account Name: YourAccountName
Forum ID (if applicable): Combattente
Your bank account number and routing information: wuts this
Your mother's maiden name: watt

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.
No, it doesn't. I'm a retard because my mom made me like this.

2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?
All the day. I'm a nerd who volunteers all the day without getting paid.

3. Include city, country, and time zone.
pineapple you, why should I give you this information?

4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)
Yes, I am. ANYTHING AGAINST HACKERS?

5. What boards do you normally post in?
General MapleStory.

6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?
No, but I can give you my cat's driver license. Yes, he can drive.

7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.
Yes. I'm well known for being a spammer and bumping old threads.

8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?
Yes. Go pineapple yourself. And for pineapple I really mean pineapple.

[GMSInfighter]

I'ma do it anyway, maybe I can get lucky.

Full name (First and Last): Adolf Hitler
Birth Date: 4.20.94
Your Account Name: GMSBrawler
Forum ID (if applicable): Wut dat?
Your bank account number and routing information: IT'S OVER 9000!!!!!!!!!
Your mother's maiden name: YOUR MUM!

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.

I'm a crack baby, I don't really know.

2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?

Everyday, cause I have no life.

3. Include city, country, and time zone.

Panama, New Zealand, Twilight Zone.

4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)

The answer is clearly yes.

5. What boards do you normally post in?

The Southperry's MapleGuide Program! kind.

6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?

Sperm sample?

7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.

My ancestors raped the characters within the account.. So yeah.

8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?

I have AIDS.

[MetaSeraphim]

Full name (First and Last): Christopher Paul Isaac Rick Astley Poole.
Birth Date: 09/09/09
Your Account Name: Fiel and Isaac's bastard child, FisaacGS.
Forum ID (if applicable): FisaacGS. Can't you read retard?
Your bank account number and routing information: Is that a sexual metaphor for anal sex?
Your mother's maiden name: MY MOTHER DIED YOU INSENSITIVE BASTARD!!! I HOPE YOU DIE IN THE MOST PAINFUL WAY POSSIBLE.

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.

I put a name?

2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?

Forever! In the past that is.

3. Include city, country, and time zone.

Everywhere, Somewhere, Nowhere.

4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)

Yes.

5. What boards do you normally post in?

Every single one of them bitches!

6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?

I can provide you with a feces sample.

7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.

Fuck no! Are you an insipid retard?

8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?

Rainbows Mother Fucker, do you speak it?

[LeGourmand]

Full name (First and Last): Simon Says
Birth Date: 1-3-37
Your Account Name: LeGourmand (methink)
Forum ID (if applicable): It is not applicable
Your bank account number and routing information: Are credit unions info okay too?
Your mother's maiden name: Iron

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.
A: I was over excited while making the account so i've made a typo.

2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?
A: From whenever this starts to till i get bored of it.

3. Include city, country, and time zone.
À:Île Sainte-Hélène(Montreal), Quebec(as Canada is no country to me), EST time

4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)
A:Does Zelda Ocarina of Time Cartridge Tilt count? If so yes.

5. What boards do you normally post in?
A: Funhouse is the only place I post, so I can do this everywhere else!

6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?
A:I'll give you a urine sample if you pay me the trip to where ever it is you do that test, cuz you can't ship that in the post, methink.

7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.
A:Totally abusing the larger size avatar for donator for free advertising for a local band, not that anyone can read the name, but it's still advertising none the less.

8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?
A: I'm gonna donate again if I don't get ban, if i get ban i'll just make a new account

[KajitiSouls]

I c wat u did ther

I'll just stick to being a normal user that punches the report button whenever I think something is wrong =D (gl reporting my reporting, non-mods) Only takes about... 5 minutes to wade through all the new posts every hour xD

[Chompy]

Fiel Providing the srs lulz to his community.
TY

[Loose]

Will you ban my account if I post in other forums!?

[xBTAx]

Pineapple, I don't have enough posts or have been here long enough.

Meh, chances are I wouldn't have been selected even if I had. Best of luck to all of you, though.

EDIT: I read the jokes but still thought this was serious. You may all slap me if you wish.

[Greg22]

kk, mod me up fiel

[Nikkey]

...wait, what?

What's up with @ random-filled "pms" here?

[MetaSeraphim]

I thought PM meant Public Message? Was I wrong?

[FelixTM]

If you manage to pass this initial application process, you will have to take a timed test. In this test, you'll be required to know the third word of every quest in Maplestory! This is used to truly test one's knowledge of the game and to ensure good applicants. Please make sure to study, and I hope to be working with you soon!

HELL YES. FINALLY MY DEDICATED QUESTING PAYS OFF.

I got this MADE, f'ags.

[ItachiPower]

Before I read the contents of what to fill out, I thought you were serious. Lol.

Here's my try:

Full name (First and Last): Lloyd Korn
Birth Date: 1932/12/5
Your Account Name: GMSIdoit
Forum ID (if applicable): Don't have one. :D
Your bank account number and routing information: 379198473. What's routing info? :D
Your mother's maiden name: I was adopted. No mama.

1. Does the name and birthdate on your account match your real name and birthdate? If not, tell us why you're a retard.
I was sexually harassed by my parents at the age of 2.
2. For what times do you plan on volunteering?
Never.
3. Include city, country, and time zone.
??, Iraq. EST
4. Are you a hacker? (No, this is not a trick question)
Damn right man.
5. What boards do you normally post in?
Mod and Admin forums!
6. If you qualify, would you be able to submit a copy of one of the following forms of identification: Driver's License, state identification, dog's pedigree, or urine sample?
I can't drive. Don't live in a state. Don't own a dog. I can't pee.
7. Is there any prior abuse on your account that you know of? If so, tell us why you're a retard.
Yes. I was banned at least 13 times this past minute. I also scammed at least 50 characters and hacked 67 accounts.
8. Before I investigate your account, is there anything else that you wish to include?
I love you.

[Nikkey]

I thought PM meant Public Message? Was I wrong?

No, I think it stands for Private Message.

Spoiler

Am I still allowed to play stupid btw?