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Thread: Online Dating

  1. Default Online Dating

    This is weird, because I never want to post, ever. But I feel like this thread could be a good discussion.

    What are your opinions and experiences as Southperricans about online dating? Whether through more 'traditional' means, like dating websites, or more 'casual' through MMO's and other similar things? What kind of dating websites have you used and found 'successful'? Have any of you Southperricans found the love of your life online?

    I'm just kind of curious about all of this, seeing as I just created a few profiles online....Being a gay male in Mormonville Utah, it's kind of difficult to go out and actually meet people. It's either online or the clubs...and I'm not a huge fan of the whole club scene. So far, I feel like I've had some successes, since I have met a few quality guys already....But then again, on the internet, anyone can pretend to be anything.

    SO. I really just want to hear people's opinions, experiences (positive and negative), or just anything in relation to the subject. KTHX.

  2. I post a lot Bi Male
    IGN: ZesseiBijin
    Server: Khaini
    Level: 204
    Job: Kanna
    Guild: NEST
    Farm: Razmosia

    Default Re: Online Dating

    I've made some of my best friends online.

    Dating though.. I'm not really sure. I haven't had the best experiences.
    I didn't really get out and meet people much anyway, because A: I can be quite socially awkward and B: The place where I lived had nothing, and nobody. So talking to people online was the way I did it. Never really met anyone that amazing though.

  3. Default Re: Online Dating

    Coming from someone who knows it all too well, bad idea. My experience, albeit making a friend who is really close to me, has been horrible and I don't wish it upon anyone. It's not entirely my fault, but the risk is there an no one deserves to be pineappleed up like that. No, just no. If you want clarification ask me privately.

  4. Donator Straight Male
    IGN: ShinkuDragon HoukaPhoenix BoshokuRaven
    Server: Scania
    Level: 152
    Job: Batman
    Guild: IDissOrtis

    Default Re: Online Dating

    i've met some pretty boss people online, but for me, e-dating is out of the question. i'm too old-fashioned in matters pertaining to the heart.

  5. Default Re: Online Dating

    I think the amount of backlash it gets is overdone and overexaggerated.

  6. Spirit of the Arrow Bi Female
    IGN: MariettaRC
    Server: Windia
    Level: 200
    Job: Bowmistress
    Guild: KoopaForce
    Alliance: KoopaEmpire

    Default Re: Online Dating

    I'd say the risk is just as bad when dating people in your area, if you know how to get to know the right people. I know of some good friends who met their spouses online, including my best friend's mother.

    Also, I met my boyfriend on Maple and I couldn't care less what people think of that. Of course, I'm by no means saying it's any better than dating people near you because both sides really need some dedication to get the long distance part to really work out.

    When it comes to online dating sites, I'm a lot more iffy on those. I'd rather not try to set up dates with people I don't know right off the bat, personally just makes me feel really uncomfortable not being friends with them first. But then again, I never bothered with those so I probably just don't know how they work.

    My opinion stems from never actually trying to find a partner, I'm sure it's a different thing for those who do. I wouldn't necessarily say they never work, because there are obviously examples that prove otherwise.

  7. Orbital Bee Cannon
    IGN: SaptaZapta
    Server: Kradia
    Level: 214
    Job: Hero
    Guild: Matriarchy
    Alliance: Dominion

    Default Re: Online Dating

    I don't know much about online dating sites, but from what I know, I don't like them. Too many liars and pretenders. In fact, I don't like offline dating/matchmaking services/events either. Like Karen, I feel like meeting a person for the first time for the express purpose of evaluating them as a possible spouse, makes for an awkward and artificial situation.

    I do believe in meeting "incidentally" through MMOs or discussion forums. I like the idea of "a meeting of minds", of getting to know a person before you know what they look or sound like. In a game like Maple, you can see how a person behaves and talks; how they handle pressure, success, failure; how they relate to people weaker or stronger than themselves; whether they are trustworthy and reliable; whether they have their priorities set straight; their opinions on random topics that come up in discussion; their intelligence and fields of interest; and so on and so forth. You become friends, over the weeks and months, and if love comes, it has a good chance of being the real thing rather than just an illusion generated by lust. (But, IMHO, if you go into the game with the mindset of looking for the love of your life, it's a lot less likely to turn out well.)

    I know of two success stories from Maple dating.
    One involves an American and an Australian who finally got together a couple of years ago after 2 or 3 years of knowing each other on Maple. Last I heard, they were expecting a baby.
    The other involves two Canadians, but he still had to move halfway across the country to be with her. They, too, knew each other on Maple for over two years before they finally met in real life. It's been over a year since, and they're still deeply in love.
    (I know more stories but none has lasted long enough yet for me to pronounce it a success)

    Interestingly, however, all four people involved in the above stories, had been Maple-married before, to other people. And professed to love them. In at least three cases, they already knew and were friends with the people they eventually ended up with, when they got married to the others. So, it's not straightforward at all. Most in-game love doesn't last, even if you don't count the younger players who fall in and out of "love" at the drop of an NX hat.

  8. Default Re: Online Dating

    They can work if you both are at flexible, independent stages of your life. It takes patience, trust at a whole other level, and really emphasizes the emotional level of your relationship. Online dating is people who want long term relationships, not flings, that's why a lot of them don't work.

  9. Default Re: Online Dating

    I have dated online before, and offline. After weighing up both.

    Although I met a great person though it I'd never actually encourage online dating , but people meet great friends online especially in social orientated games like maplestory and great friendships lead to solid relationships. I feel meeting people offline is important to develop important life experiences but if you are willing to actually get off your butt and meet this person then by all means give it a try, just be careful because theres a lot of creepers online..

    tl:dr, It works yes, but don't consider it your only option.

  10. Donator Straight Female
    IGN: icephoenix21
    Server: Scania
    Level: 212
    Job: Bishop
    Guild: DremithCross
    Alliance: Evolution
    Farm: IcePhoenix

    Default Re: Online Dating

    I don't think I'd ever rely on a dating site.

    I always said I would never really be into the online dating scene...and I was wrong >.>
    But I don't regret it. Meeting someone online, or long distance forces you to get to know that person a lot better, imo, than someone you can meet up with face to face that just may want a fling or something...that being said, I would never be interested in an online-only relationship. I would want to meet eventually.

  11. Default Re: Online Dating

    Well, I can tell you it might work out.
    I wasn't planning on it but I met my own girlfriend two and a half years ago on a site called omgpop.
    We started as friends but eventually started dating. Well I sort of have an extreme case since my girlfriend lives
    3500 miles away from me but even then we made it work out. I'm actually going there again in 9 weeks (America)
    to celebrate new years eve with her on new times square. And spending the night in a motel nearby.
    We have been together for 1 year and 9 months now and i'm extremely happy I found this girl.
    And as far as I know, I will spend the rest of my life with her.

    I'd tell more but I doubt my story would be relevant to this thread seeing my girlfriend is living so far away.

    But yeah, you just have to be really carefull with what you're doing if you are going to try and find someone
    on purpose on a specific site. There are so many liars and people with bad intentions. I still think
    going out in person is the best way to go but hey, you never know. Just be carefull and dont rush into
    conclusions about someone. No matter how perfect someone might seem, it could still turn out really badly.


    ''Online dating is people who want long term relationships, not flings, that's why a lot of them don't work.''

    This. Dont forget this either.

    EDIT: Changed lettertype for easier reading.

  12. Default Re: Online Dating

    I have experience with online dating sites.

    What I have learned is, regardless of gender, it's full of liars and undesirable people. It's difficult enough as is sifting through garbage to find someone you can relate to. Then when you think you've found that person, their goals aren't in line with yours.

    I've met two girls in person. The first one only wanted sex. The second lived two far away and we both agreed it was too much for us. For me, there was also a lack of a spark.

    My other experiences usually just end after asking to meet up, because a lot of people seem to not want to use dating sites to date- they just want to email back and forth or text.

    So yeah, I find it easier to date someone you meet through casual encounters rather than from online dating sites.

  13. Default Re: Online Dating

    I think it's okay if you two are willing to make it work and visiting is a must in addition to accepting the fact that you two must work harder to maintain it.

    My ex's sister met someone through a dating site (OKCupid) and now she's engaged to him.

    I never understood why people ridicule other people for doing it though. If it works, more power to them. If it doesn't, it's not their business anyway.

  14. Neutron Female
    IGN: HEYsammi
    Server: Scania
    Level: 200
    Job: Evan
    Guild: DremithCross
    Alliance: Evolution

    Default Re: Online Dating

    I don't really mind it. Tried it once; most important thing is you have to be mature and rational (but that should got for most types of dating), imo.

  15. Default Re: Online Dating

    I know some really good friends in maple, and i can say i trust in like 4 of them at a 100%, but daiting... Never, it's too risky and the cases where it ends in a happy ending at least for me, it's just luck or god's way to do things

  16. Default Re: Online Dating

    I'm not a fan of online dating but it's well-documented how I feel about love in general.

  17. Default Re: Online Dating

    This, a year or two ago i was often ridculed for dating on maple, even though the girl was someone I have actually met in person.

    I think the view of online dating being for desperate and those who could never meet a real girl is tossed around way too much. Online or Offline there's always going to be someone who would like you, it's just a matter of putting yourself out there.

    To this day, Meeting that person was the most terrifying and exciting day of my life (oh and the best)

  18. Neon Atom Straight Female
    IGN: BawssLyk
    Server: El Nido
    Level: 200
    Job: Mercedes
    Guild: LegacyReborn
    Alliance: Twerk

    Default Re: Online Dating

    To be honest, it really depends on what kind of people are in the relationship. Both people have to stay committed and be able to deal with the distance from the other person, otherwise it just won't work. Some people can handle it, others just flat out can't. I say if you can handle the distance, go for it.

    To be honest I love hearing stories about other online couples' relationships working out because I'm in one myself (for 1 year 9 months now, will be 10 months in 11 days). A lot of people give me crap about it for some reason, but I just shrug it off seeing as they usually don't understand.

  19. Default Re: Online Dating

    I don't think an answer will get better than that one.

    As for me, I admit in my early MS days, I would meet a lot of girls and had a few strictly Online GFs. I eventually stopped, when I came back to playing MS in 2011 I played it strictly as a game. I didn't even go out of my way to add people to my BL. I joined a guild, I met people...and one of those people I met I started to talk to a lot more than I had originally planned. From MS chat, it eventually went to MSN, from MSN to on the Phone, from on the Phone to Webcam. Eventually she flew to meet me in San Francisco.. that feels like it was forever ago.

    We are now happily engaged, with our wedding date set to take place on Nov 1st. We live together, and I honestly never thought I would find my Wife on Maplestory, but I am thankful everyday that I have. So I suppose, yes online dating can be very successful...if you abide by what KhainiWest said.

  20. Spirit of the Arrow Bi Female
    IGN: MariettaRC
    Server: Windia
    Level: 200
    Job: Bowmistress
    Guild: KoopaForce
    Alliance: KoopaEmpire

    Default Re: Online Dating

    It's very nice proof that there are people out there who don't go for just a pretty face but rather, personality, which is really one of the most important aspects of a relationship. Not to mention, and this goes for regular friendships as well, it gives the socially awkward a chance to know people without having to be in their presence first.

    Both my best friend and my boyfriend (as well as myself) are extremely socially awkward. But we consider each other to be absolute best friends. I actually met my best friend on an old PPG forum back in 2003 and she has an overbearing mother who has always watched who she spoke to online (she was 10 at the time so there was good reason to do so). I was the first person she was allowed to speak to and if things go well, I'll be spending Christmas with her family for the second time this year.



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