Quotes =)

"It doesn't take special talents to reproduce -- even plants can do it. On the other hand, contributing to a program like Emacs takes real skill. That is really something to be proud of.

It helps more people, too. " - Richard Stallman

That one made me laugh. Good old Stallman.

About the LHC:
"The claim is that 'micro black holes' could be formed which would suck up the earth. Firstly, black holes don't suck any more than a bit of mass-energy, secondly we know that black holes evaporate very rapidly so could do no harm and thirdly, no-one expects them to be formed in the first place. It's just bad anti-science baloney." - Dr David Hutchison, the guy who taught me particle physics, relativity and cosmology last semester.

I've got a million of awesome quotes but I have no idea who wrote them.
Yea there's a lot of them here but they're really good ^__^

A million words couldn't bring you back I know because I've tried, neither could a million tears I know because I've cried.

I've spent my whole life looking for someone I could live with, when I should've been looking for the one I couldn't live without.

Wow, these pills are like sex, except I'm having them

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming, like the passengers in his car....

You know that look women get when they want sex?... Me neither!

The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty.

Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range.

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

^(I think this one is by Homer Simpson)

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.

Your mama is so fat, when she sings, its over.

I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was "You'll never find anyone like me again!" I'm thinking, "I sure hope not! If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you."

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Women: Can't live with them, can't bury them in the back yard without the neighbors seeing.

Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

^(one of my favorites)

Tell a lie long enough, and people eventually start believing it. ~Hitler

Let muddy water stand still and it will gradually clear

Quote from the book "Garden of the Purple Dragon" by Carole Wilkinson

"I have already intimated to you the danger of parties in the state, with particular reference to the founding of them on geographical discriminations. Let me now take a more comprehensive view, and warn you in the most solemn manner against the baneful effects of the spirit of party, generally.

The alternate domination of one faction over another, sharpened by the spirit of revenge, natural to party dissension, which in different ages and countries has perpetrated the most horrid enormities, is itself a frightful despotism. But this leads at length to a more formal and permanent despotism. The disorders and miseries, which result, gradually incline the minds of men to seek security and repose in the absolute power of an individual; and sooner or later the chief of some prevailing faction, more able or more fortunate than his competitors, turns this disposition to the purposes of his own elevation, on the ruins of Public Liberty.

The common and continual mischiefs of the spirit of party are sufficient to make it the interest and duty of a wise people to discourage and restrain it.
It serves always to distract the Public Councils, and enfeeble the Public Administration. It agitates the Community with ill-founded jealousies and false alarms; kindles the animosity of one part against another, foments occasionally riot and insurrection."

~George Washington

He warned us...

I liked George Washington. He was a very wise man... No one listens to him *rolls eyes*

Here's another one:

"In order to make good in your chosen task, it's important to have someone you want to do it for. The greatest moments in life are not concerned with the selfish achievements but rather with the things we do for the people we love and esteem, and whose respect we need." -Walt Disney

Walt is the shiznit xD

E=MC^2
~Do I really have to list who put this up?

Aww it got moved to speakeasy D=

lol

[SIZE="1"]"life is unexpected; so start unexpecting things."
probably the most smartest thing i've ever said in my 17 years of living.[/SIZE]

Who said that life should be fair? ~ ???

I say that life should be fair! ~Dennis Brent, English teacher, Whitney High School, CA

"I failed in life because I didn't work my ass off
I succeed in life because i have enjoyed every moment"
~Me

I didn't realize until now that my planner has a weekly quote!
Every one since the start of my school:

The earth has music for those who listen. ~Shakespeare

A day without laughter is a day wasted. ~Charlie Chaplin

Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature...
Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. ~Helen Keller

A man can be destroyed but not defeated. ~Ernest Hemingway

"The best is the enemy of the good."

"If you are ashamed to stand by your colors, you had better seek another flag."

"Live for nothing, or die for something"

[SIZE="2"]Idk if someone mentioned this one yet :

"If you say "PLZ" just because it's shorter than "PLEASE" I feel perfectly justified to say "NO" because it's shorter than "YES".[/SIZE]

I love this quote...

I AM SOOOOOOOOO SURPRISED NO ONE HAS SAID THIS QUOTE OMFG =D

"You can't spell slaughter without Laughter" =D idk who

"A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him." - Winston churchill

"A friend is one who has the same enemies as you have." - Abraham Lincoln

"ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country."
John F. Kennedy

if you didnt understand it by now, nx items never GIVE stuff. they only TAKE stuff.

So very true.

-I'd like to thank each and every one of you. ~Various show announcers

- (@above quote) But they never do! So now I'd like to thank each and every one of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you... (x30) ~Dennis Brent

Education is what you get when you read the fine print; experience is what you get when you don't. ~ Pete Seeger

"Ladies and gentlemen, set yourself on fire! Why? You can't remember why...
Because everyone I love is a thief. Because we were born in unbelieving, both you & I;
our bodies will burn in effigies of promise. I swear." --Ibi Kaslik (Kliapatra's sig)

Curiosity killed the cat; lucky for cats they have 9 lives, and lucky for me that i'm not a cat