Who Comes Up With This Stuff?

Obviously sorting through emails is tedious, boring, and rather annoying. But of course, there is the junk email that makes the day a bit lighter.

Email 1: Foreign Hoe

Hello my friend!

I write you this letter as today on mine e-mail has come the Internet
Dispatch with yours e-mail. In the given letter, it was spoken about
the love Relations between people. Therefore I have decided to write
you the letter on yours e-mail. I as to search for serious relations
as I wish to find The true love. My name is Lusik. I, as well as all
women of our country, I like to cook food as to go in for sports. I do
not smoke and not I take alcohol. I search for the real man who will
love, and To respect me. I wish to get acquainted with you more close,
by means of e-mail.

Please answer only to my personal e-mail: aslusik@yahoo.com

I hope, that you will answer me mine e-mail the address. As I with the
big Impatience I will wait your letter to me, with more detailed story.

Lusik.

Email 2: What the Hell

Hi Jane, After the birth of our first child I started to feel changes in our love life. Frank was concerned, he asked what was the matter with me, but I was too shy to tell him the truth. I needed a bigger size. Finally I�ve mustered all my courage to tell him. Everything was happily resolved. Ann

Email 3: I'm not Mike

Hi, Mike, Thanks for sending me this link. At last I’ve found an online casino I feel very comfortable with. You know, I’ve tried a lot of them. First of all I like the software, the clarity and colors, the variety of games. The customer service is cool too and everyone is just so nice! Thanks a lot, Cliff