2009-08-13, 01:05 AM
Stopping a kid from learning swearing doesnt mean swearing wont happen. That's a patched up solution. Stopping you from playing a game, just because a game has people who swears is silly. People swear everywhere.
Relationship should be open, truthful and respectful. What does that mean? Well, between a mother and a son say, they shouldnt hide anything or being fearful of anything between them. Successful parenting requires a friendship-type relationship between the parent and the child.
From being able to openly discuss any topics, it leads to truthful convo. If a kid innocently asked the mom/dad "What does plum muffin means?" You can simply explain to them that "It is a bad word with defamatory meanings. You should not use them when talk to others." for example, is a much better approach than "OH JESUS WHERE DID YOU HEARD THAT FROM? I FORBID YOU FROM PLAYING THAT GAME EVER AGAIN!!!". You as the parent have effectively scared the child, prompting future hesitations or even hiding certain things from you.
As for respect, it's a privilege, not a right, even as a parent. You need to earn respect from your kids. If you dont actually respect them, then they wont respect you either. Everything must be absolute but compassionate at the same time. Dont be overly harsh, which can come accross as unreasonable, but at the same time, dont be too linence, which leads to whining. If your kids respect you, they'll be more open and truthful to you.
tl;dr; (which happens to be lots of my posts these days) Parent shouldnt freak out and go ban-happy on kids just cause they're curious of something.
Relationship should be open, truthful and respectful. What does that mean? Well, between a mother and a son say, they shouldnt hide anything or being fearful of anything between them. Successful parenting requires a friendship-type relationship between the parent and the child.
From being able to openly discuss any topics, it leads to truthful convo. If a kid innocently asked the mom/dad "What does plum muffin means?" You can simply explain to them that "It is a bad word with defamatory meanings. You should not use them when talk to others." for example, is a much better approach than "OH JESUS WHERE DID YOU HEARD THAT FROM? I FORBID YOU FROM PLAYING THAT GAME EVER AGAIN!!!". You as the parent have effectively scared the child, prompting future hesitations or even hiding certain things from you.
As for respect, it's a privilege, not a right, even as a parent. You need to earn respect from your kids. If you dont actually respect them, then they wont respect you either. Everything must be absolute but compassionate at the same time. Dont be overly harsh, which can come accross as unreasonable, but at the same time, dont be too linence, which leads to whining. If your kids respect you, they'll be more open and truthful to you.
tl;dr; (which happens to be lots of my posts these days) Parent shouldnt freak out and go ban-happy on kids just cause they're curious of something.