2013-12-21, 06:27 AM
Tonight for the first time in months, I woke up screaming in the middle of the night. Another nightmare. And even after all these months that he's been gone, when I wake up my first instinct is to reach out to the empty space next to me in bed.
He promised he would be here to keep me safe. He promised he would be here to chase the demons away. And now there is only darkness.
I cried, not because of the nightmare, not because of the demons in my head, but because of the boy who left me here alone to fight them off by myself. He promised he would be here for me. He promised he would never leave. He promised he would love me forever. So much for all of that.
So here I am, typing this out at 2 in the morning, tired as fuck, staring at this goddamned computer screen instead of trying to go back to sleep. Because what if they're waiting for me on the other side?
He left a hole in my heart, a hole in a promise, a hole on the side of my bed...
He promised he would be here to keep me safe. He promised he would be here to chase the demons away. And now there is only darkness.
I cried, not because of the nightmare, not because of the demons in my head, but because of the boy who left me here alone to fight them off by myself. He promised he would be here for me. He promised he would never leave. He promised he would love me forever. So much for all of that.
So here I am, typing this out at 2 in the morning, tired as fuck, staring at this goddamned computer screen instead of trying to go back to sleep. Because what if they're waiting for me on the other side?