I've been struggling with these concepts for far too long now; and while I know that "some people take years to figure out what they want to do"; it feels that despite getting support from numerous support programs for over a year now, I've not made a bit of progress. They all give plenty of nice advice, but when I ask how to change the core that drives me to act upon this advice, they simply retort with the common phrase of "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink". And "that has to be something that comes from within you".
That's all well and good, but I'd at least like some advice on how to nurture that part of myself which I seem absolutely blind to at the moment. There are plenty of services out there to help those with motivation; but lacking in knowledge or skills, or in harsh personal conditions; but the perspective of those without motivation is that they are lazy slobs who simply don't wish to contribute to society. There do happen to be exceptions there who are looking how to change themselves, but really just don't know how other than this ambiguous "it will come to you". The harsh approach? "Do that since, realistically based on finances, your life depends on it". Sorry, I'm not suicidal or anything, but that won't cut it since I don't value myself that high. The thankful approach? "Travel to some third world country and experience the harshness of their lives. Work on their behalf so that you can better the world." Until you realize that you've been living your life of comfort on the backs of hundreds of thousands in this state; and if you are lucky you'd be able to improve the lives of a few dozen.
I overcame insomnia a while ago, but ever since that bit of progress, it seems to be near impossible to maintain any sort of regularity in my life and I genuinely don't know where to ask these questions anymore since anything beyond what services I've requested is reserved for those with much larger impediments to re-entering society. I'd like to change myself so that I don't end up the leeching scum of society who is too "lazy" to bother with.
I may have left on a sour note several months ago; but this is still a resource I'd consider for advice. I may be barking up the wrong tree for all this, but I still have to try what's out there.
I'd like to ask what motivates each of you Southperrians to get up in the morning. What keeps you striving day-in-day-out to keep moving forward. What it feels like to have a passion for something and live it. At what point did you form dreams? At what point did you decide to pursue them? Is having a "mentor" the only way to go? How about those who do not have loved ones or a social network with them that they strive to support?
Honestly, you're [likely] suffering from depression and should seek professional assistance before soliciting answers from people who are unqualified in helping you with this matter.
What works for me isn't necessarily going to work for you. Maybe I'll respond as to what motivates me later, though.
You could think about it differently: what if you did stuff despite having no motivations?
I don't have plans for the future, or something to wake up for every morning... I just do what I do because it's better than sleeping all day.
hello, the problem may be that you are wanting to achieve the outcome of getting over whatever problems you are having, while the process might be more important
i also had and have been having problems similar to yours. a bit depressed, dont know what to do with my life, have absolutely no regularity or motivation in my life, barely any loved ones, friends, social networks to support me. for some months, i have quit school and really have done nothing progressive.
support programs? may sound weird, but i have been trying not to get any help...
when you are having the problems, all may seem impossible, just until u get a small grasp of motivation, hope, et.c
the quote "it will come to you" is sorta true, and theres a difference between "literally doing nothing with your life" and "doing nothing with your life." in the latter, u may be doing something, such as playing games, listening to music, et.c, and as un progressive as that sounds, it can give you motivation.
as for me, i have found some motivation in music and religion, though that does not mean i want to work as a musician or have a religious job. i dont even go to church these days cause im so lazy.
look for things that you do! again, whatever outcomes that it will bring is not important at the moment. motivation does not have to be something like going to a 3rd world country and seeing that your life is much better so u should be happy.... that does not make sense. you are not happy, and that should not be associated with how much wealth you have.
Motivation is the thing that K-12 teachers tell their students they don't have enough of so they don't give up on an education. Teachers often do this because it makes students easier to manage by preventing them from dealing with real personal issues early on in their childhood, therefore giving them a positive panacea coupled along with arbitrary "You're Special!" stickers, meanwhile at night they are with the union ensuring that there will be equal treatment and a safety net from being fired in case the next round of budget cuts come and the principal is looking for a couple of generic teachers to axe to just break even. Maybe if teachers themselves had someone taller and older smiling and giving them teddy bear stickers that said, "Cheer up you can do it! Just bear with it!" they too wouldn't need to rely on collective job action to leverage against the sordid risk of being job less. Motivation is also usually what pre-meds tell themselves repeatedly instead of admitting that they just fall short of the high academic standards of medical school:
e.g. "I know that I haven't done well, but it's because I wasn't all that motivated!! Things will get better next semester if I care about it more!!"
See: Organic Chemistry
Motivation is commonly used to refer to an ego gap. A gap that defines the space between a person's self-perceived current status and the status that they perceive they should be at or should attain:
e.g. "I may be working at McDonalds now! But I'm motivated to some day move up and work the big leagues at the front counter of Panera!"
See: Objective measurement of the ego gap can be charted by the name plate theory. The farther away your name is from your physical body, the more important you are. Name is on your chest, you are working minimum wage as a cashier or salesman. Name is on your desk, you are some low level management calling some shots. Name is on your door, you are likely middle class middle income middle management, good job! Name is on the building you work in, you're an exec or someone at the higher rung of the economy. Your name is on something overseas, you're likely overseas on the opposite hemisphere sipping martinis or what have you.
Motivation is rarely used to describe more realistic, albeit less respectable social endeavors:
e.g. "I am motivated to kill myself because all I see in my life is a series of dead end jobs that go nowhere despite how much I try to motivate myself." OR "I am motivated to drown as many kegs as possible and finish going through that entire folder of porn I downloaded last night."
Motivation is sometimes treated as a red flag during interviews:
e.g. "Motivated self-start individual who is interested in working generic mundane job with little to no relevant credentials. But please keep in mind I am a hard worker and I am motivated."
Tom couldn't figure out why he didn't get the job. He thought that he was unique in that he was the only person who thought he was a hard working and motivated individual despite the tough economy and bad times. Even though he didn't get the job, Tom did know one thing. He wasn't a liar to be a hire.
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